Rainbows and unicorns.

trillow:

[police officer] “sir are you in possession of any illegal drugs”

“sure thing son whatchu need”

I think it’s funny that people who treat you like shit get offended when you finally do the same to them.

(Source: sarahkeating)

adventuresinslumberland:

A little old lady just told me i have strong hands and a gentle touch
And that it reminded her of her first husband
I have no idea how to react

emiello:

You are not just your thighs
You are not just your nose
You are not just your belly 
You are not just your weight

You are not imperfect
You are not flawed
You are not unworthy

You are more and you are yourself

Stop thinking of yourself as a sum of undesirable parts, and start thinking of yourself as a whole person.

erincutlah:

Isn’t it weird when you see your friends make-out, or is it just me?

foxnewsofficial:

walk into the club like “what’s the wifi password” 

shotadreams:

mage-of-katnep:

rainbowsfireworks:

confusedtree:

ollivander:

lampghost:

[sleep-over voice] are you awake

[sleep-over reply voice] yeah

[regrettable sleepover invitee voice] you guys SHH

[confused sleep-over voice] what is the meaning of life

[annoyed sleep-over voice] dude shut up

[sleep-over host voice] you guys be quiet my moms gonna hear us

janecrocker:

my girlfriend is stunning. she literally stuns me. she is a taser gun.

(Source: morristibbs)